2.12.16

Lost First Drafts

Jane Austen
Rejected zombies for men
(Unless they'd an Earldom
And 3,000 guineas per annum).

or do you prefer

Jane Austen
Never mentioned the hymen,
Though she featured the hymnal
Twice in "Pious and Prejudicial".


Cassandra Austen
© National Portrait Gallery, London


19.11.16

Another Secret Society?

Interviewees' 'phones
Ringing during live news spots
The Interrupti

or do you prefer

Dan Brown
Would let witches drown
Before breaking the vow of secrecy
Surrounding the Interrupti




16.11.16

12.11.16

Vegans

If men are from Mars
And women from Venus, who's
From Alpha Lyrae?

© Norton's Star Atlas, Sixteenth Edition, 1973

26.10.16

Poles apart

Sir Ernest Henry Shackleton
Enjoyed a bad pun.
But he went to the ends of the Earth
To give irony a wide berth.


 
credit: Wikipedia


Or perhaps you prefer

Sir Ernest Henry Shackleton,
Like a gag writer, enjoyed the odd pun.
But he went to the ends of the Earth
To give simile a wide berth.

Or even

Sir Ernest Henry Shackleton
Enjoyed a bad pun.
But he went to the ends of the Earth
To give hyperbole the widest possible berth.






21.10.16

You kip if you want...

Al Murray, the Pub Landlord,
In Thanet South, trod a different board.
A full quota of kippers were smoked
And Nigel's ego was poked.

or do you prefer

Al Murray, the Pub Landlord,
In Thanet, struck a satirical chord
As Nigel Farage, the Pub Bloke,
Fear of foreigners did stoke.


Credit: BBC

20.10.16

One Serious Villain

Ernst Stavro Blofeld
Envies the Vulcan mind-meld;
Ordering henchmen by gesticulation
Frees Bond to go on saving the nation.


Publicity image. Source: Wikipedia

16.10.16

25.9.16

Time Paradox

Modern urban scourge
Graffiti tags deface art
Historical worth



Graffiti of Ancient Pompeii
Collated by Prof. Brian Harvey

20.9.16

The Parlour

Ticking clock empty
Tick... tock... tick... tock... tick... tock... tick...
Tick... tock.... tick..... wurrrr... ching!



Inspired by @JoannaCannon's 
The Trouble With Goats And Sheep
Thanks for the inspiration